How NOT To Speak To Your Gangsta

Team USA

The Ladies admit to having become quite taken with Team USA. They all look like they're having so much fun, getting along like a Boy Scout troop on a camping trip. A couple of things have come to our attention; maybe our alert readers can back up our observations:


Did David Wright and/or the Mets do something personally to piss off ESPN announcer Rick Sutcliff? We realize you are jealous that you are no longer pitching in the bigs, but what's with the love for EVERY player on the team except DWright? Is he too handsome for you? We haven't seen such biased announcing since Al Leiter joined up with YES.


For those of you in Milwalkee - what's with Ryan Braun's tongue? We are intrigued. Watch him next game, and tell us what you think, Ladies.

With last night's win over Venezuela, Team USA has a few days off, to further the bonding process. The Ladies predict lots of shaving-cream jokes and giggling over who has bedded the most models/actresses (we're putting our money on Jeter)

Chipper is hurt. We're shocked. This gives DWright and his gold glove third base for the foreseeable future. Not to mention his 3 for 5 from Sunday night, right, Rick? You knuckle-dragging meat.

Get well soon, Jerry!

Later, gangstas.

Take Note!

Our friend, the honorary Lady on the Field Danielle, over at The Wright Stuff, has moved her site of awesome shirts and merchandise here. Give her a visit, and keep in mind Danielle donates the profits from her sales to the David Wright Foundation, cause she's a good egg.

The Ladies would like to give a big gangsta kiss to our site visitors from Toronto, is it cold up there? Hope you have someone keeping you warm - if not, remember, we're always here for you. Cause we're good eggs too!

Kisses, gangstas!

Girl, Interrupted

The ladies send their sympathies over to Randy at Talk-Sports. If there was ever a reason for spiking the country's water supply with Lithium, the David Wright board over there is it.

Hang in there, Randy!

Where, Oh Where Have Our Metsies Gone?

And it was all going so well...Spring Training was in full swing, our boys were slowly getting in their cuts, pitches and hunting practice, and then - they're gone. Just like that. Port St Lucie is left with a motley assortment of prospects, career minor leaguers and Bob, the groundskeeper. Not to mention those on the big league roster too injured or small-time for the WBC, such as Johan (much to the chagrin of Hugo Chavez), Ryan Church, Brian Schneider and our resident expert in self-flagellation, Metallica John Maine.


This means the Ladies' attention is split. Do we focus our attention on the gangstas left in Jerry's camp? Or do we hunt down our boys on their various teams, to make sure they are not being unduly influenced by consorting with the enemy (Jose, stay FAR away from Tejada and Ramirez, OK?) Let's check in quickly with our travelers, then pop back in to PSL.


Team USA is having a love-fest. David Wright loves Derek Jeter, Chipper Jones loves David Wright. Even Jimmy Rollins and David Wright have buried the hatchet, at least for now, although Jeter better stay alert in the locker room. We wouldn't put it past Rollins to plant a smoke bomb in Wright's locker. Even David Letterman gets in on the romance, having the team read Thursday's Top Ten List. The Ladies are only mildly interested in the WBC; it is competitive baseball to watch but ehh...all we can say is if USA cannot beat Canada, don't come home (well, send DWright and J.J. home, the rest of you stay up there with the grizzlys)

Team DR with Jose and a couple of ex-Mets - Pedro (remember him?) and Moises Alou. The kissy-face with A-Rod and Jose is over, as A-Rod is out with an injury, and manager Felipe Alou has already screwed up, using Hanley Ramirez at SS instead of Jose in today's game against the Netherlands. The Marlin (a team known for their defense - not!) made an error in the first inning that allowed two runs, which were the deciding runs in DR's LOSS to the Dutch today. Yes, I said LOSS. The WBC world is rocked!

Now to the PR team with our Carloses, among others. Take care, boys, don't get hurt, we need you this year. And look after Alex Cora, our newest infielder, as we will need his glove when the inevitable Slappy McSlapperton injury occurs. Don't feel bad if you don't make it to the finals vs USA as we would hate to see the Mets' core playing each other.

Team Mexico - with Ollie - please lose early and often. Johan has more mentoring work to do with Ollie, and we need them back together in PSL.

Speaking of PSL, Johan's throwing schedule is back on track, and he is determined to open the season in Cinncinati, as befits an ace. Let him, Jerry. Please.
A word to Johnny Maine. Relax, dude. You'll be fine.
Injuries recently reported can be found here. Add Mike Pelfrey to the list, with a muscle strain. Wrap yourselves in bubble wrap, guys. As a matter of fact, the Ladies volunteer to fly down there and help with that process. A sacrifice, sure, but we're willing.


There is probably much more to report on, but LadyMet is exhausted by all the baseball after so many long, barren months. And since our spring training regimen consists of sitting in front of the computer reading Metsblog and eating peanuts, we're still a little out of shape.

Road Trip!

David Wright: 100 bottles of beer on the wall, 100 bottles of beer...

J.J. Putz: Oh God! How long is the ride to Clearwater?

DW: Three hours. C'mon, sing along! 99 bottles of beer on the wall...

J.J.: Where's my rifle?

Seriously, this is the ride that carried J.J. Putz and David Wright to Clearwater for Team USA, to start the WBC. I hope they remembered the corsages for their dates.

Fifteen of our gangstas are now scattered throughout Florida and beyond, preparing for WBC action. The Ladies would like to remind you guys of one thing: The METS pay your salaries! So don't do anything stupid that will get you hurt, like, you know, sliding. Or throwing hard. Or running, for that matter.

Recent spring training action has been a stew of good news, bad news. Which goes without saying, as that is the motto for Mets fans. Some highlights and lowlights:

Johan is hurt! No, he's not! Yes he is! No, he's not!

Metsblog's Matt Cerrone makes like Katie Couric and interviews everyone in sight.

Brian Schneider hits a grand slam. Yes, you read that right. Mets beat Houston, 13-1. Nice.

The Mets signed their 1,056th pitcher this year: Former Yankee Ron Villone.

Speaking of interviews, the lovely Zoe over at Pick Me Up Some Mets has some great TV moments from this week, as John Maine interviews Kevin Burkhart and Keith's moustache legend grows.

The Ladies must go now and dig out from under the 12 feet of snow that has fallen lately. Enjoy the sunshine, gangstas!

Kisses for now!

Evil Has Come To The Kingdom

Wormtongue aka Mike Francesa


Culture: human

Devious servant of the wizard Steinbrenner, Wormtongue was an advisor and confidant to King George of Tampa. Wormtongue used his influence on the weakened king to manipulate the New York City sports media to his true master’s purposes. Mad Dog revived King George from his magic induced coma in Yankee Stadium. Wormtongue was cast out of Tampa and fled to Port St. Lucie.

and the people of Port St. Lucie barely survived the experience before Prince Omar* of Rohan came and banished Wormtongue forever

Good riddance, you evil demon-lover!

*Actually, Prince Omar simply sucked up to Wormtongue so badly Wormtongue developed diabetes and needed to leave for medical attention...