Dreamin'...

Picture this: LadyMet and hubby are settled in for a good night's sleep. As the snoring commences, both begin to experience the same dream...

A nailbiter of a game...David Wright slides headfirst into home on a sac fly, tying the game in the second at one apiece. Carlos Delgado hits a monster shot that adds two runs to the board in the sixth. Carlos Beltran saves a run with an incredible catch in center field. Then in the bottom of the ninth, with the bases loaded, one out, down by a run, our boy wonder gets up. He watches a couple of pitches, then it happens...he smacks a single to right field! Two runs score! We win the game!! Jubilant, he jumps and raises his fists...yeah!! He is tackled by his teammates in celebration! Jeter and Victorino are the first to reach him. He is tackled by the rest, and ends up on the ground, face first, as the pile celebrates.

Wait, WHAT??? Who tackles him? Why are Carlos y Carlos leaving the field with tears in their eyes? We won!
What the FUCK!!! Startled, LadyMet and hubby awake suddenly, sweating.

LadyMet's hubby voices her own thought..."We gotta stop eating Ben & Jerry's before bed..."

Monday, Monday...So Good To Me...

Bonus points if you can identify the song in the title of this post! Hint: You must be over the age of 30 to even have a chance at this...


Anyhoo, a warning to Port St Lucie residents - our very own Lady G is headed down there this weekend to provide John Maine with some encouragement and comfort- crosswords, fried okra (good luck getting THAT thru security, G!) and many hugs for our emo-ridden righty. We are looking forward to reports from her from- wait for it - the field!

Speaking of Lady G, she reports that Duaner "Wild Thing" Sanchez has signed a minor league deal with San Diego. We wish him nothing but good luck there, except when he pitches aganist us, naturally.

Just got thru reading Will Leitch's article on the Mets in NY Mag - now we're depressed. Thanks, Will.

On a positive note, while our stars have been off prancing around with the likes of Hanley Ramierz, Jimmy Rollins (shutter) and Derek Jeter, those left behind have been making good use of increased playing time. Nick Evans, in particular, looking to come out from under Daniel (Don't Call Me Dan) Murphy's shadow, has been tearing it up in spring training play, batting .325 with 10 rbbies. Maybe that kick in the butt from David Wright on Super Bowl Sunday is doing him some good. Ryan Church is looking like his pre-concussion self, hitting .314 and feeling good.

Later, gangstas!

Where, Oh Where Have Our Metsies Gone?

And it was all going so well...Spring Training was in full swing, our boys were slowly getting in their cuts, pitches and hunting practice, and then - they're gone. Just like that. Port St Lucie is left with a motley assortment of prospects, career minor leaguers and Bob, the groundskeeper. Not to mention those on the big league roster too injured or small-time for the WBC, such as Johan (much to the chagrin of Hugo Chavez), Ryan Church, Brian Schneider and our resident expert in self-flagellation, Metallica John Maine.


This means the Ladies' attention is split. Do we focus our attention on the gangstas left in Jerry's camp? Or do we hunt down our boys on their various teams, to make sure they are not being unduly influenced by consorting with the enemy (Jose, stay FAR away from Tejada and Ramirez, OK?) Let's check in quickly with our travelers, then pop back in to PSL.


Team USA is having a love-fest. David Wright loves Derek Jeter, Chipper Jones loves David Wright. Even Jimmy Rollins and David Wright have buried the hatchet, at least for now, although Jeter better stay alert in the locker room. We wouldn't put it past Rollins to plant a smoke bomb in Wright's locker. Even David Letterman gets in on the romance, having the team read Thursday's Top Ten List. The Ladies are only mildly interested in the WBC; it is competitive baseball to watch but ehh...all we can say is if USA cannot beat Canada, don't come home (well, send DWright and J.J. home, the rest of you stay up there with the grizzlys)

Team DR with Jose and a couple of ex-Mets - Pedro (remember him?) and Moises Alou. The kissy-face with A-Rod and Jose is over, as A-Rod is out with an injury, and manager Felipe Alou has already screwed up, using Hanley Ramirez at SS instead of Jose in today's game against the Netherlands. The Marlin (a team known for their defense - not!) made an error in the first inning that allowed two runs, which were the deciding runs in DR's LOSS to the Dutch today. Yes, I said LOSS. The WBC world is rocked!

Now to the PR team with our Carloses, among others. Take care, boys, don't get hurt, we need you this year. And look after Alex Cora, our newest infielder, as we will need his glove when the inevitable Slappy McSlapperton injury occurs. Don't feel bad if you don't make it to the finals vs USA as we would hate to see the Mets' core playing each other.

Team Mexico - with Ollie - please lose early and often. Johan has more mentoring work to do with Ollie, and we need them back together in PSL.

Speaking of PSL, Johan's throwing schedule is back on track, and he is determined to open the season in Cinncinati, as befits an ace. Let him, Jerry. Please.
A word to Johnny Maine. Relax, dude. You'll be fine.
Injuries recently reported can be found here. Add Mike Pelfrey to the list, with a muscle strain. Wrap yourselves in bubble wrap, guys. As a matter of fact, the Ladies volunteer to fly down there and help with that process. A sacrifice, sure, but we're willing.


There is probably much more to report on, but LadyMet is exhausted by all the baseball after so many long, barren months. And since our spring training regimen consists of sitting in front of the computer reading Metsblog and eating peanuts, we're still a little out of shape.

Off-Season Action We'd Love To See

As the Hot-Stove continues and Sweet Scott Bora$ is taking his time getting his players settled, the Ladies began to imagine hot-stove action in an alternate universe. Where stats like OPS, WHIP, BA and ERA take a back seat to those of HotA (hotness average), BOS (balls of steel) and CHa (clubhouse antics), not to mention the all-important GOS (gossip factor). Following are some moves the Ladies are considering to improve our team and better our chances to win the coveted World Series of Gangstas solid gold phallic-symbol trophy:

1. Trade Brian Schneider to the Twins for Joe Mauer. This is a no-brainer. Joe's HotA is head and shoulders above Schneider's (right, stars?). We love Brian; he is a good person, friend of David Wright, devoted family man etc., but this is a business, sorry; you got to go. While Brian's participation in last year's "OMG" David and Molly show helped the team's GOS, we can't help but feel that Joe's single status will propel the team's GOS to new heights.
We don't see the Twins having a problem with this; they gave us Johan Santana last year for assorted spare parts and a boom-box for the clubhouse.

2. Purchase Bronson Arroyo's contract from the Cincinnati Reds. His GOS is so high he rates his own thread on OTDL, an honor only Jeter, DWright and a few others have warranted. He plays in a rock band, loves his cougars and tends to have foot-in-mouth disease. His influence on our young, still-getting-the-hang-of-this-gangsta-thing pitchers (Big Pelf, John Maine) will be worth paying him Bora$ money. Put this boy in New York and watch him take over.

3. Trade Jose Feliciano to the NY Rangers for goalie Henrik Lundqvist. The Ladies must give credit to Shimmy over at LLR for this find. King Henrik has a through-the-roof HotA and proven BOS (standing in front of a net while five NHL players fly at you and try to take out your teeth with a puck moving at 100+ per hour gives you a BOS of 1.000). He can back up Joe Mauer at catcher and occasionally provide some good CHa by telling Omar his fly is undone in Swedish. Plus anyone who will fuck with Sean Avery is righteous, in our book.
The Rangers win from this deal also: imagine the on-ice confusion when Jose starts screaming at their opponents in Spanish.

Untouchables:

The left side of the infield. While across town, the Yankees have the amazing duo of Derek Jeter and A-Rod, undisputed MLB leaders in GOS; contenders in HotA (although A-Rod's poor showing in BOS is an issue), our beloved Mets have the young David Wright and Jose Reyes, both of whom are coming into their own in HotA and GOS. Even the CHa numbers from last year have improved.

Other moves are being considered, and will be revealed as they occur.